Friday, November 13, 2009


Hey, Dan. If you were a leader of a country with no Bill of Rights, what would you do?

Really random question, Lauren, but I have nothing better to post about.

Well, dang. That small country would be pretty screwed up with me as its leader (1. because I'm 15, 2. because I'm pretty lazy.)

I guess my First Order of Official Business would be to elect someone older than me to be my 'Personal Advisor to the King' (my PAK) who would be smart and nice enough to help me out with the whole 'running a country' thing.

I think I would change some of the things that I think are wrong about this society. It would be easier with a small country than the U.S., so it could be way easier to limit the homeless, the unemployed, the J.D.’s. It would be much easier to make a difference with one small piece, than the whole puzzle.

I would also ban Home Ec. from schools, because I understand what those poor children who can’t cook are going through. It’s just unnecessary torture (that goes for sewing to). I bet Math would have to stay, though. I’ll just leave that for my ancestors to deal with.

Then, my PAK and I would establish the 'Dan Code' that all citizens would have to abide by, or they would be bludgeoned to death with a stick.

Just kidding, just kidding.

They would totally be beaten with a mace, not a dumb ol’ stick! What good would a stick do? No one would say, “Better not break the law. Don’t wanna get hit with The Stick.” Actually, that does sound pretty hard-core.

Sorry, off topic.

Anyway, the Dan Code would have your everyday average laws, with a little more thrown in. For example:

#65: Don’t do drugs (only dopes do dope).

#78: No killing, unless you have permission by the King or the PAK (Haha, better watch out, you Home Ec. teachers! You, too, Miley Cyrus!)

#265: Don’t hit anyone with a stick. Everyone knows maces are much more effective.

I’ll let you know when I establish my own country, because I know you’re just dying to immigrate.